So, this is my third piece of a six-sentence story in this hop. The Key is a story of a young boy falling for a girl that can not see her worth. I really liked this week’s prompt word. This story, a fiction also thrives from real life and the people I have known.
the prompt was created by our wonderful girlieontheedge
A small ad before the story, sorry.
Rules of the hop:
Write 6 Sentences. No more. No less.
Use the current week’s prompt word.
PROMPT WORD: KEY
Others’ stories can be read here.
Six-Sentence Story – the Key
It was as if he was venturing into the halls of an old abandoned building and as he stood there on the door frame, clutching a key in his sweaty palms, he couldn’t help but be perplexed at the fact that anyone could ever show such neglect to something so majestic.
It was as if her skin was a canvas for the scribbles of the people who used to live there and as he was tracing his fingers on the scars he felt the need to protect the beauty and knowledge that they withheld.
Yes, even if her halls were empty and void of life, she was beautiful to him, such a miracle of existence that he wanted to hold her in his arms, away from the cruelty of being alive, as the key in his palm burned into his skin.
He didn’t know any other way to show his admiration than to shower the curtains with kisses or be amazed by every corner in the room – the love he felt tasted sweeter than the agave syrup he was used to putting into his coffee.
But he couldn’t even hold her in the morning before hearing her muttering: “Please, leave”, and with that, he felt the daggers that people used to leave marks on others push into his flesh.
And the key he held on so tightly tumbled from his hand down the stairs and it felt as if the rustic door to the paradise he had been dreaming of had shut forever.
Links To My Work
Stories: Six-Sentence Stories, Short Stories, Romance and All That, Dead Poet
My band “Chaos in Spring” can be listened to on YouTube, Spotify and other streaming services.
Words can leave wounds and even heal. Nice description of the key falling down the stairs.
Thank you so much!!! Weirdly enough that was the first line I got down too, everything else built up to that. I had the line and the plot.
Felt like I was right there in the story. Great Six.
Thank you so much, such words make me feel that I did what I wanted to do with my words.
What an original take on unrequited love. Bravo.
Thank you.
But who knows, maybe she does love him, just thinks it is better this way.
Some people are just hurt too badly to try again.
Maybe he will keep knocking on her windows, who knows.
Beautifully, achingly, haunting…as it is often when stardust and beasts collide.
Aww, thank you! I think that God went a little crazy on the duality, but that is what makes life… a life.
An inspired take on the prompt word. A sorrowful tale skillfully told.
Thank you so much, once again.
Yow!*
All too true, yet to recognize such interactions as others experience it (or similar found and lost opportunities), somehow helps becomes more positive than negative.
Thoughtful Six.
*compliment on an engaging and almost tactile Six
Thank you! I always feel like want to frame such comments and keep them on my wall to remind me to keep writing more. Thank you for warming my heart once again.
Splendid imagery! A well-crafted Six.
Thank you!
words can wound, good job with the use of the key
Thank you!
Great six and use of the ‘key’ word.
Thank You!
Enjoyed this haunting and beautiful gothic tale. Love the name of your blog too!
Ford
Thank you so-so much!!! Yes, I have used the same name before on Tumblr and Blogspot – about from the time I was 16. I want it Tattooed.
Such sadness and hope in the very first line. The metaphor of a building (I imagine an old Victorian style house) is perfect for the complexity of the apparent relationship – craftsman in love with a thing of beauty, damaged by time and elements.
P.S. Read your intro. I’m glad you are enjoying SSS and…thank you.
Thank you for creating those challenges. Glad I found you.
And thank you so much, I also was envisioning an old Victorian building. They are so beautiful yet make one sad with the condition they are in.
Thank you!
A great take on the idea that Home is where the heart is.
He had the key, but lost it, sadly. Splendid Six!
Thank you!